Home

Ok-Isopod7359 Archive

View 0 posts and 25 comments by Ok-Isopod7359 on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
Search in:
In subreddits:
More
Filter by year/month:
Upvotes Title Category Author Subreddit Date (UTC)
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
14

Assuming no cheating or vices... She was promised happily ever after and didn't get it. Now she needs someone to blame. And personal responsibility is off the table. So you get all of the weight of it. I'd disengage from the drama. Gray rock. No winning or losing. Just next steps.
/r/Divorce_Men21/08/26 05:04 PM
7

My ex wife checked out of a divorce she wanted. She just wasn't functional, didn't respond to offers. It dragged out for a couple of years. A local state process (MSC) put an end to it. She ended up with a worse settlement than my offers. Don't stress too much. Let the fat lady sing first.
/r/Divorce_Men21/08/26 04:55 PM
1

The heart to heart stuff seems silly to me. Talking about my day, stressors, and stuff - I'm not sure what it accomplishes. I'm just talking to another human being and that costs $0. But as a way to learn helpful techniques? Meditation? Schema therapy? All that kind of stuff did actually help me survive my divorce.
/r/Divorce_Men19/08/26 02:16 PM
3

Credit cards and then a signature loan. I hear most people's credit scores drop during divorce. And that was true for me. I kept adding more money to cards I couldn't pay off because, like you said, divorce locks funds up. My rolling debt went above zero for the first time. FICO dropped from 800+ to low 600s. I was surprised I even got a signature loan. Chase preemptively dropped my credit limit from like $5000 to $500. Zero missed payments. Be careful of that. I had my dad as backup but never u…
/r/Divorce_Men13/08/26 06:36 PM
3

Much of online dating is validation. Girls want their photos admired. They also get a lot of likes and "realistic matches" get thrown in the trash while they hunt down the players. I'd stick with the work friends and activities for now. No soul searching or trauma dumping. I know you said you consider it shallow. But just find a routine with other people. It will eventually feel natural, probably not at first tho. Build from there.
/r/Divorce_Men12/08/26 11:35 PM
2

My ex and I had long talks about being a power couple, buying a home, travel, egalitarian in both work and home. LOL. Yeah, that didn't work out. I lapped her five times on salary. And I found out that she was criminally lazy. She told me my choices were to divorce and pay alimony for the rest of my life or shut up. The U.S. got so hung up on women's rights that the pendulum went flying by and left men in a real lurch. The solution is simple tho: don't get married.
/r/Divorce_Men12/08/26 10:43 PM
1

Married 23 years. Mostly adult children. We owned a home with no debt. I made $250k + bonus and RSUs at the time. That's dropped to $170 base only with a job change. She made $50k base only. Right after term sheets, she bumped her salary up to $70k + 30k overtime. Of course. No alimony. No child support. Every line cut. I lost 50% of my assets. Family law fees were about $30k. There was some additional odds and ends. We sold right as the 2% rates were disappearing. I count that as a tremendous l…
/r/Divorce_Men11/08/26 07:53 PM
1

Kill them with kindness. But don't be stupid about it. If it's heavier than a ladder, complain about lower back pain. And if you like FUs without saying FU, quietly pick a contractor's name NextDoor. Doesn't matter who. Give her the number and say that guy Jake from the gym used him and he's really good." Be sincere and all smiles.
/r/Divorce_Men29/07/26 11:50 PM
1

I'm happy with my divorce a few years in the rear view mirror. I think things turned out pretty much how they should have. But I was devastated with doubt and confusion for the two years we divorced. There were a lot of ups and downs. But everything pretty much landed on an up.
/r/Divorce_Men29/07/26 10:53 PM
2

Why not music? For me, it started as a personal challenge. My worse flaw as a human being is horrible rhythm. I reached a stage after a year that I felt, yes, I could do this given enough time. And it's become a journey more than a destination. I love learning new things and gaining experience. I'm pretty good actually. It could be we're not born with passion but have to seek it out.
/r/Divorce_Men25/07/26 05:17 AM
1

The hang low has awoken.
/r/Divorce_Men25/07/26 04:46 AM
2

I put my electronic photos on google drive. I threw away prints and kept the negatives.
/r/Divorce_Men20/07/26 04:44 AM
1

$0. California. 25 year marriage. She was so uncooperative even her own lawyer wanted it over with. Her side accidentally leaked an email to my side of her fighting with her lawyer. CA has MSC which I asked for just to get it over with. She fought with the arbitrator leading the negotiations. My kids were 16 and 21 at the time. The 16 year old stayed with me (and is still with me seven years later). So no child support was necessary. I didn't ask her to pay anything. College was all on me. And I…
/r/Divorce_Men20/07/26 03:40 AM
1

Youtube has a lot of police video cam footage. Every woman who screams nee nee nee, gets tased or refuses a ticket sounds just like my ex wife. It's triggering. Obsession, same effect.
/r/Divorce_Men18/07/26 05:58 PM
–

I had more trouble finding a home for mine. I had to find a rental with a private yard which would allow pets. One is a lab and it'd just be cruel not to have a fenced yard. We have a nice dog park in a bay. And I take him all the time. But it's not enough. He needs a lot of exercise. After pet deposits and $300/mo hikes, it'd be $4000/mo for a two bedroom in San Diego. Too rich for my blood. Or I'd have to move me and my son to a bad neighborhood. My ex wouldn't take the dogs. My ex-inlaws woul…
/r/Divorce_Men18/07/26 05:39 PM
4

Moving out can mean giving up residency. Talk to a lawyer before you do. My ex moved out. And I feel lucky she did. She never re-entered the house. When she wanted stuff, I put it in the garage and left the door open for a couple of hours. Nice and peaceful.
/r/Divorce_Men16/07/26 07:35 PM
1

Hinge is one of the sites with usable free tier. Facebook is another. But in my experience, you get more motivated people on paid sites. Match has (had?) a way of seeing who paid and who didn't. So liking or matching with paid subscribers is a thing. I've gotten a lot of dates on Hinge. But they were all shallow. Match is where I found two LTRs since divorce. [Edit: Match sucks and nickels and dimes to death. Still, it's still the best site I've found]
/r/Divorce_Men16/07/26 04:02 PM
2

I did schema therapy for a while. It was useful. I think we ran out of methodology around six months. I mean, you distill out the terminology layer and you're left with "this might be the source and this might be the fix." And that's extremely useful. Beyond that, it just turned into small talk. I didn't see a reason to continue. Pro tip: if you're a counselor doing video visits, make sure the room is well lit (masks changes in brightness when surfing the web) and pay the extra $50 for non-refle…
/r/Divorce_Men22/04/26 03:45 AM
1

I divorced in CA at ... 52 I think. They say divorce over 50 is financial suicide. And that's unfortunately accurate for me. I'm rebuilding savings. But divorce has absolutely changed my retirement plans. I decided it was over when she dropped the vacuum cleaner down the stairs. Same setup. I'm a high earner. She is not. I felt career building should be an obligation for both of us. She did not. I felt she should do some more housework. She did not. I was the sole vacuumer. We had so many fights…
/r/Divorce_Men21/04/26 05:41 PM
1

Every court appearance I had was boring. We figured out what was blocking and how to unblock. Then we set the next court appearance. Five minutes.
/r/Divorce_Men21/04/26 05:31 PM
2

I don't think you can help her through this. She's on some bullshit path of fulfillment. It's a personal journey. It will take her a couple of years to figure out fulfillment isn't another person's obligation. Until that happens, you will probably be dissected a million ways to figure out exactly how you (sic) ruined her life. "Last month she said she will make her mind and decide." -- this is a f'd up move. It's the worst way to handle these kinds of things. It's a power move to string someone …
/r/Divorce_Men21/04/26 05:28 PM
3

We had a couple of hotel rooms while separated. Later she called me drunk during the actual divorce. I think that was the last time we spoke directly to one another. She went all revenge. She drank much more than usual. She joined the man haters' club where other women made vicarious decisions for her. She felt like she belonged. The XX committee wanted to burn everything down. So my ex made the divorce a nightmare. I blocked her across the gamut, social media, phone, sms, all of it. A year late…
/r/Divorce_Men21/04/26 05:17 PM
2

Uncontested can mean various things. At some point, I think most couples start to tune into money, kids, and the home and what the end game really means, and if so, things turn into a fight. Age matters too. The older, the more retirement conscious with higher stakes. I'm in CA. I paid roughly $27k on my divorce lawyer. No kids. The cost was mostly driven by my ex-wife's games, switching lawyers many times, not responding to offers. No kids. Just a stupid ex who thinks being enemies is more fulf…
/r/Divorce_Men21/04/26 05:03 PM
1

Divorce by mediation is a thing. Unfortunately. I think it falls through most times. It's for people who have an agreement, don't care enough to fight, and not much is on the line - meager savings, no kids, etc. I've seen it work when one spouse was a professional skate boarder. True story. Also watch out for lawyers who try to sell mediation at $400/hr. You want a paralegal or similar who can fill out forms for a flat rate.
/r/Divorce_Men21/04/26 04:52 PM
3

Head games. Check out and don't engage. Being as boring and predictable as possible is the only winning response.
/r/Divorce_Men21/04/26 04:45 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

© TheRedArchive 2026. All rights reserved.
created by /u/dream-hunter