breakevencloud Archive

Upvotes	Title	Category	Author	Subreddit	Date (UTC)
33	Honestly, the worst about the whole thing for me is		breakevencloud	/r/Divorce_Men	11/08/26 12:25 AM

Upvotes	Comment on	Subreddit	Date (UTC)
2	Struggling to not try and ruin her life Nah, don’t let them have that kind of power over you, man. It ain’t worth it to let people you have no interest in consume your thoughts or feelings.	/r/Divorce_Men	21/08/26 10:44 AM
6	My wife filed for divorce, but we’ll still be living together for now. Has anyone reconciled before it became final? For me, personally, I’ve been living in the same house with my marriage over for about a month and a half now, and it has been the BEST thing for me. I was so blinded by my “husband” duty or whatever and the amount of love I have for her that I failed to see how shitty I had been getting treated over the last few years of our marriage. One she moved out of the shared bed room, we cut communication unless it was pertaining to our kid or the current arrangement. Once the almost-no-contact kicked i…	/r/Divorce_Men	20/08/26 06:35 PM
1	So... what are the first steps? Get consults with several attorneys if you don’t already have one and hire the one that feels like the best fit Starting today, start a journal where you simply log whatever you do with/for your kid during each day. This is to protect yourself in the event that you two can’t agree on a custody arrangement and it has to go to trial. Basically it’s just a real easy way to show the extent of your regular involvement in your kids life. I’m not talking about writing a legit journal entry, but I just …	/r/Divorce_Men	19/08/26 10:15 PM
1	Cannot help the feeling “What if I am entirely mistaken/delusional” So, I have had this same struggle here and there since my shit blew up, and obviously my situation and yours are probably not the same, but that said, it seems like every time I had that “Am I fucking up?” thought, inevitably within the next 48 hours, my soon-to-be-ex would show me something that completely reinforced that getting divorced is absolutely the best thing for me, Emotionally, mentally, physically. All of it. It’s so easy (and natural) for us to fall back in our heads to the best of …	/r/Divorce_Men	19/08/26 05:05 PM
8	Regression and sadness In the wise words of Charlie Sheen, “No…no, don’t listen to the heart! The heart deceives, it only remembers the good times!” And that’s just so true. You’ve gotta work on being able to appreciate the good times for what they were, but also understand that the good-good times were the outliers in the relationship, more than likely. Don’t put up with people who will be blatantly disrespectful to you and disrespectful toward your relationship.	/r/Divorce_Men	18/08/26 07:31 PM
5	TBXW wants to try marriage counseling before ending things for good. Brother, you just said you’re “scared” in relation to this person and what they could say or do to you. That’s your answer. You can’t be in a healthy or happy relationship if that is ever a realistic thought you’re going to have about your spouse. Sounds to me like you’ve finally gotten towards some freedom and she wants to get hooks back in you because, well…controlling people don’t like to see their former partners thriving. My situation isn’t the same as yours, as far as specifics, but I am m…	/r/Divorce_Men	17/08/26 11:54 PM
2	Listen to yourself Holy shit, I feel like I wrote this. I’ve just gotten to my “oh yeah, my voice actually matters” stage and it is wonderful. I’m absolutely never getting run over again and I can’t wait for my soon-to-be-ex to try and steamroll me once all the shit starts and look baffled when I don’t bow down to her whims.	/r/Divorce_Men	13/08/26 08:30 PM
3	Honestly, the worst about the whole thing for me is This feels pretty relevant to my situation as well. Like you, I prioritize getting home from work so I can spend time with the kiddo and on stuff I actually want to do. Meanwhile, her entire life revolves around her job, 24/7.	/r/Divorce_Men	11/08/26 07:54 PM
2	Honestly, the worst about the whole thing for me is Damn dude, I’m sorry. As crappy as my situation feels, I can’t imagine what that must have been like, just given the timing. Hope you’re hanging in there, brother	/r/Divorce_Men	11/08/26 07:52 PM
3	Honestly, the worst about the whole thing for me is This is the biggest lesson I’ve learned. That last part…never give more when they start giving less. Cause that’s exactly what I did and, boy, did that lead to some frustration blossoming into some resentment on my end. There I thought I was “being a good husband” or whatever, but nah, I was definitely just being a doofus, unfair to myself, and also unfair to her. Keeping all of those feelings to myself when they started to fester was its own form of manipulation that I’m now recognizing and und…	/r/Divorce_Men	11/08/26 07:51 PM
13	Honestly, the worst about the whole thing for me is My brother, I got hit with that exact same line almost. “I don’t know how to be what you need me to be.” So your first option is to blow up the family? Like what?	/r/Divorce_Men	11/08/26 01:40 AM
5	How many of you feel that you're better off since your divorce? Share the reasons why and the ways life has improved. In the process of going through mine and every single one of these things (except the new partner one) is on my list of “why life is going to be better”	/r/Divorce_Men	08/08/26 12:56 PM
7	Why is it 2nd Marriages Fail Even More Than the 1st? I have no data to support this claim, but my brain rationalizes it by saying: When people divorce, either one or both parties are heavily at fault. Assuming no self improvement by the divorced people, that means the divorced-and-single group probably has, what, maybe 2/3 of the pool at primary fault for their first marriage failing? So, if they’ve made no changes, it’s hard to see a better outcome next time when you put two of those people together. As someone else said also, I think part of it …	/r/Divorce_Men	06/08/26 01:54 AM
4	Surprised being served This is the absolute biggest thing I have learned since my marriage blew up. I am typically a “whatever makes everyone’s life easier” type of person who will just go along with whatever to get it over with, but I have been obsessively logging any and all information that could potentially be relevant if my soon-to-be-ex flips the amicable switch to the “off” position and tries to bulldoze her way into fruition with me because she was able to do that in our marriage. As you say, hope and attempt …	/r/Divorce_Men	05/08/26 10:40 PM
5	I should be laughing but I’m not. Man, I am in a very similar situation as you are. Mine happened a little over a month ago and I was so desperate to try and fix it and save it and all that crap for the first two weeks. Then, I started to rationally look at where my marriage was. And then I started keeping a small notebook where I will write down any thoughts or comments I see around here that give me reassurance for why the upcoming divorce is the best thing for myself and why there is no chance I would ever go back in the futu…	/r/Divorce_Men	05/08/26 10:32 PM
2	Nobody told me that 'no closure' also applied to the rebuilding of a life Man, I’m going through it right now and stumbled upon this thread and your comment just…hit me in the exact way I’ve needed. My marriage recently blew up in my face, wife is still living with me in separate rooms, and she has yet to give me (or anybody else for that matter) any kind of real, actual reason for why she is so nonchalantly throwing away almost 15 years together. I mean, I’m over the marriage and the relationship and all that at his point, but the “why did this happen” question is so…	/r/Divorce_Men	25/07/26 11:11 PM