Nothing like some 'quality reporting'!

DangZagnut · 2017-11-16T00:03:20+00:00

The more accomplished the jock, the worse the sex. Think of ego as coitus poison. Date an athlete, and you’re soaking in it. Date a pro, and you might as well call yourself Cleopatra and snuggle with the nearest asp.

So why aren't you snuggling with an asp if the sex is so bad? Oh right, it's not about sex. It's about validation and attention and status. Sexual gratification isn't that important to women compared to those things.

Athletes who pursue highbrow or individual sports—polo players, climbers, marathoners—are no better at jiggling your gigi than the gung ho, bit-chomping team-sporters. They just grunt less.

Sounds like you just starfish there waiting for it to be over. Again, why not put some effort into sex as you're complaining about? Oh right, it's not about sex and it's not that important to you.

Small things come in big packages. “Compensation” is an ugly word. It also happens to be the right one. (Basketball players are by and large excluded.)

Oh now it makes sense.

Athletes are babies. Doyle, a well-rounded jock I loved dearly, once likened performing oral sex to retrieving olives from the bottom of a narrow jar using just your tongue. “It hurts my neck,” he whined, adding “I’d never ask you to do something that hurt.” Sad but true, I thought.

Doyle? Doyle? Was he that weird looking sailor who ate a lot of kale?

Athletes frequently are in a lot of pain. Even girl athletes. Things hurt. Remember all those football players with concussions who are shells of human beings? I bet those guys hurt too. And he was being nice not asking you to do painful things.

Or Doyle was being polite because your vagina smelled like vomit? Sorry for the vulgarity, but there is a bacterial imbalance that will cause your vag to smell like vomit. Not just the "tuna taco" joke, that's a different bacteria, Gardnerella vaginalis IIRC.

Athletes have misplaced priorities. Time spent humping is time not spent training, eating or sleeping. For them, sex is low on the list, somewhere between flossing and cleaning hair out of the shower drain. In fact, most athletes are warped enough to believe that improving their vertical is more important than boning up on their horizontal.

Well they're usually offered a lot of it by the busload of gold digging whores, so it's not big thing to them. And they're profession/scholarship/career may be the reason they focus on it more than licking out your tuna taco.

Athletes are distracted—by time, by training, by their reflection in your lava lamp. Many a night I’ve opened my eyes and observed my partner stealing glances at his rippled stomach, oblivious to any naked form but his own. Once I even made shadow puppets behind my lover’s back. Bobby the tennis pro didn’t notice until 20 minutes into the match. He was too busy perfecting his stroke.

So why do you apparently keep dating them if they are sooooo stupid? Oh right, it's not about sex, it's about status and validation.

Athletes are conservative. Let’s face it, jocks are conditioned creatures, beefy lab rats depressing the feed lever until they drown in kibble. They’re accustomed to simple, repetitive movements with a concrete goal in sight. I’ll tell you right now, that goal is not your screaming meemie. You can also throw away the nanny uniform and the rubber dress.

And? Just because I'm a kinkcter doesn't mean everyone has to be. Perhaps you should date some low status neckbeards and be a waifu worship object. Then you can be into tentacles and fart porn all you want. Make sure to pull out the rubber sailor moon outfit. Oh right, it's not about sex, it's about status and validation and someone who eats Cheetos^tm won't give you that.

Every athlete thinks he’s the exception to axioms 1 through 7.

And every starfish thinks they're a sex goddess.

ThrowawayGhostGuy1 · 2017-11-15T23:24:30+00:00

Hey, they got theirs, and you got the wall

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Nothing like some 'quality reporting'!

Comments

Title	Nothing like some 'quality reporting'!
Author	SerendipityIsMe
Upvotes	4
Comments	2
Date	November 15, 2017 11:18 PM UTC (8 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MGTOW
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MGTOW/comments/7d84s7/nothing_like_some_quality_reporting/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MGTOW/nothing-like-some-quality-reporting.535403 https://theredarchive.com/post/535403