Monk Mode and the concept of MGTOW (as articulated by some) don't do anything for me. I developed what I call ME MODE.

1 Task Specific

First off, what Me Mode is not:

  • it is not an annual cleansing ritual

  • it is not a time to get your shit wired tight, your head out of your ass or your mind straightened out

  • it is not used to enter a phase of substantial weight gain or weight loss

On the latter point, you shouldn't need more than an extra hour a day if you are hitting the gym hard and preparing a customized diet. That being said, you probably don't want to go into Me Mode while you are packing it on or dropping it off.

Me Mode is where you have a project or a goal that you want/need to complete for yourself. It's ME Mode, not My Boss Mode or My Girlfriend Mode or even My [enter family member] Mode.

Some examples include:

a) composing and recording a new track for the CD you have been working on for seemingly forever

b) finishing the basement or some other home reno

c) negotiating, tendering or closing a business deal (again, for you, not your work-a-day job)

d) a company start-up, whether as a side gig or jumping in with both feet to be a full-time entrepreneur

e) hunting down a job offer at a substancial pay hike so you can hit up your current employer for a raise that beats it, or tender your resignation

f) fixing up that '67 Mustang you found in the junk yard

g) patenting that invention

h)other creative endeavours: painting, writing, building a bird house

WTF, it doesn't matter much but something for you.

2 One to Four Hours a Day

Minimum. Stick to your basic necessities: sleep, eat, wash, work for a paycheck. Everything else is Me Time and that 1 to 4 hours takes priority over anything else. If you have the stamina and nothing else on the table, you can stretch that to 6 hours. Any more than that creates problems with the next point.

3 Sleep

Get a solid 8 hours every night. If your body will let you, shoot for 10 hours. Do the math: 8 hours of work, 10 hours of sleep, 2 hours on necessities, 4 hours on your project. That's 24 hours. On weekends, put in 4 hours on Saturday and Sunday. Sleep in a bit but 8am to 12pm should be Me Time.

4 Socializing

There is a personal finance rule that comes from The Wealthy Barber or its precursors: "Pay yourself first". The idea there is that when you get your paycheck you sock away some savings before doing anything else with your money. In this case always put in time on your project - minimum one hour - before you do anything else.

There is no rule against meeting your chums for some chit-chat, but put in your time first.

5 Alcohol

Two drink limit and no more than two times a week. Taken with 4, above, sure you can go out for a beer with the boys - again, this isn't monk mode.

6 Women

If you are not in a STR/LTR/Marriage and are not spinning plates or have FWBs:

No Approach Rule. No day game, definately no night game (WTF are you doing in a meat market club while in Me Mode?) no swiping on Tinder, no openers on other online sites.

On the latter point, check your inbox no more that twice a week. However, "targets of opportunity" are allowed. Fish? Barrel? Ok, go for it, but then follow the rest of this point.

To fap or not to fap? Fap avoidance: you need that excess nervous energy to get the job done. It's not a hard rule and on the other hand (to coin a double double entendre) if you need a twang of the wire to take the edge off from a stressful day, then fine but no more than twice a week.

If you have a girl:

a) She comes second to your goal

b) She commutes; you never spend a night at her place

c) See Rule 4. If she arrives unannounced, she can watch re-runs of Oprah while you put in your time.

d) Unless you practice Tantric sex, don't fuck more than twice a week. Note the comment above about fapping.

e) To the extent possible, get blowjobs and cowgirl. Save your energy for your project.

f) No drama. If she gives you drama, call her a taxi and send her the fuck home.

g) Max 2 "dates" a week. Dinner and a movie or whatever. Put in your time and then go out, but not more than twice a week.

h) If you think you have a good connection, then explain what you are doing and why. If she is supportive, then good for you. If she gives you drama, see f).

i) as a follow up to h) and e), if she will clean, cook, and service you then all the better.

7 Timelines and Goals

There is the remote possibility that one could make this a lifestyle, but for me - and I think generally - we are looking at a 4 to 8 month horizon. In less than 4 months you can't get anything notable done and more than 8 months will drag on you . For your consideration.