TL:DR; The mind is just a tool. Its input is whatever you interact with in the external world (your influences). The output is thoughts. Don't identity with all your thoughts, because they may be wrong, (because there is shit input) and cause you needless pain.

The mind is a recording centre for whatever happens in the outside world. It just collects and uses collected data to make judgements about what's happening in the present moment. The issue is you need to view it as such, and not get completely consumed by it. The mind will offer something all the time, you have to make the choice to use it or ignore it. If your past recordings have been shit (like prohibitive social conditioning, or learned ineffective habits of dealing with things) it will offer you shit. So if you keep identifying with your thoughts all the time, you keep repeating the same shit for sometimes decades and live the same sad life many times.

You can't do anything about what your mind has recorded in the past (social conditioning, parental negligence, other bad references, etc.) What you should do though is realise that your mind is just a tool and constantly maintain a healthy boundary with it. Stop letting it run wild with thoughts and become alert instead. Learn to dismiss it sometimes like a shit test from a woman.

Practice observing your thoughts and emotions whenever you can. In the bus, in a line, wherever you can. You will eventually create a strong enough boundary as you observe how the mind just keeps on parroting the same three or four things all the time. How, perhaps, 90% of the thoughts we have are useless. (Sidenote: I personally find Eckhart Tolle's teachings quite useful in my practice)

Most people today are in the clutches of their mind stream. They don't use their mind as just a tool. They use it as if their whole being is their thoughts. I guess this could be because there is a lot of focus on activities that require constant usage of the mind (internet, smartphone, television), in which you are constantly interpreting and interacting with things using the mind. The content on these mediums is designed (or gets designed) to constantly simulate the mind too. Education and academics are all mind dominated streams. So people are getting used to using their mind all the time. It has become a bad habit of an entire generation.

Break the bad habit of abusing your mind (and in turn being abused by it). Life will be lighter, because you won't be worried about anything. You will dismiss thoughts and emotions associated with worrying, like a shit test, and instead just take the best action you know against the issue. If you succeed, good! If you fail then you won't beat yourself up because you will know that it is ultimately useless to do that. You will learn your lesson and move on to the next thing. No anxiety, restlessness, etc. and this is just the beginning. The ease and calmness seeps into all areas of life, and life's challenges become easier. As a side benefit, you also develop true IDGAF attitude!

Explore readings on "being present in the moment" for more on this idea.