i have been going to the driving range recently, i genuinely enjoy golf. i feel like it's as meditative as yoga for me. i would like to know if ladies had any tips on identifying HVM there. it's not in my nature like a friend i have to talk to everybody. she strikes up conversation with everyone. that's not my style. but am i shooting myself in the foot? i am going to stop saying 'I'm just going to be myself.i don't want to play games' because I've learnt through FDS that that is a cop out. it's basically giving up boundaries and strategy. these things come naturally to many people, but i am not one of those people. i was raised dysfunctionally and am only now trying to learn healthy dating skills.

i don't want to attract guys who will chat up every woman either. i'd prefer a guy who is like me, more reserved and discretionary. but my worry is that i am too closed off and would repel guys like that. in your experiences, when HVM have approached, what were you doing, and what were you doing to be 'available' to the present moment?