I met a woman online ^((Jun 2019)). We chatted just enough to be comfortable; not longer. We exchanged numbers. We talked enough to be comfortable. We decided to meet. Other dates happened, etc. Somewhere in there, she expressed a concern about my current situation and wanting to take it easy. I agreed. I didn't realize at the time, I was building a trap for myself.

She's a great person and I decided I didn't want to be bound by that agreement. I told her how I felt. I realize it could have gone several ways. But, it went south. I've thought about it and what I came to is that I was in a catch-22. If I pressed things against her wishes, I'd be breaking my word. But, if I don't press it, I'm going against who I am. Plus, if I pretend that taking things slow could work, I'd be kidding myself. If I'm not escalating and expressing who I am, there's not point in this investment. So, we are no longer going out. It ended politely and I think without anger (none on my part).

I don't know exactly the point of this, but it keeps talking to me. I think I would caution people about making any promises that limit your self expression. I would also encourage constant escalation if you are serious about locking-in a relationship. Escalation always matters.